After all the health issues of this week, the drama with DH, and other dramas, this morning I was simultaneously sooooo ready to take the sacrament and so not wanting to even put forth the energy of going to church.
With much effort, I get the kids ready after DH drops them off (This is one thing I have to say about him.....he is flexible in letting them attend church 99% of the time. Kudos, DH!). We all get in the car and....it won't start. -sigh- It finally does and off to church we go....then K (who had been complaining of a stomach ache all morning) now says she thinks she is going to throw up. Oh, joy.
We get to church 13 minutes late. I park far away and reverse into my parking spot to make it easier if I need a jump after church and head in...barely making it for the sacrament in the foyer. Not exactly the quiet moments of reflection and peace I had envisioned.
What more could possibly go wrong?
Yet, what more could possibly be right?
In the midst of it all, Sacrament Meeting was amazing and the Spirit was so strong. I knew I was in the right place. Then, after dropping of the kids at DH's after church, I came home and watched a CES fireside from Elder Scott, given in 1999 (love the DVR!). It was just EXACTLY what I needed. Questions I'd had about my situation, DH, and where to go from here were all answered in the Lord's own way. Maybe I needed to feel so broken so I could be put together with the Lord's loving hands.
Thank-you for your thoughts and prayers. Keep them up. The rest of 2009 promises to still be difficult, but, for now...I am doing really well and, compared to yesterday, it feels sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good! :)
Addendum: I just had to document that we feel so loved tonight. Life was already 1,000,000% better than yesterday and to make it even better, we had an outpouring of love. We had carolers, doorbell ditchers, Relief Society presidency, and our dear Bishop and his wife all drop in on us just tonight. The Lord has taken care of us. He has shown his love through others and I am truly grateful. My support system has been immense and, I must admit, that while there are definitely times I feel so alone and abandoned, there are many more times that I feel so loved. Thank-you. Thank-you. Thank-you.
6 hours ago