Life has many "seasons." There is a time for everything and everything in its time. Most seasons of my life I don't understand exactly, but all are dictated by the Lord and dedicated to Him. My CK season is done (at least for now). I had the horrible task of saying goodbye to him today. It hurt. Really hurt. It is one of the deepest pains I have EVER experienced. I know I will be back to crying myself to sleep tonight. I think that having the "no" answer and being obedient is much more difficult than having the "yes" answer and feeling confused. I have a whole new level of respect for M.
Now, my season is to be alone. I am never all the way alone, but I mean without a man. I have been so lucky and blessed that almost since the day my divorce was final I have had a man/men to talk to and/or date. I have been blessed to come to know many wonderful men. At this point, though, I have a season of learning, discovery, and growth just for me. I want to develop my talents, hobbies, and professional opportunities. I want to be the very best mother I can-the one my children need and deserve. I want to be prepared to be the best wife I can be in every single aspect. I want to be ready to embrace my future step-children with all my heart. I want to serve with all that is within me, listen to the Lord every day, and strive to completely align my life with His will for me.
It is a new season. I don't know how long it will be or where I will be for my next season, but, for now, I am alone and I am okay with that. Every season that is as the Lord dictates I will embrace, including this one. :)
17 hours ago