Broken

Sometimes it really seems like the storms of life come in bunches. It happens to all of us, but right now it really seems like I can't catch a break. So many things are broken.

First, my heart. It is still broken, although healing slowly.
Second, my car....it needs some sort of repair that I am guessing will be rather extensive, but it surely is not running properly and I have to get it in this week.
Third, my body. I actually have a doctor's appointment for today, since I am having problems that must be addressed.
Fourth, my fridge. It has stopped working. I have no idea how much it will cost and all the spoiling food will cost. I am so used to having it, too, and now it would not be wise to go shopping and fill it up with fresh food to spoil. -sigh-

The good thing about being broken....you have the chance to be fixed! :)

Saturday...March 27

We have had so much going on that I have to hurry and document them since each day has been filled to the brim with happenings. Friday night, I spent the night at my sister's. We played games, laughed, and listened to funny songs. After everyone went to bed, I caught up on my emailing, scriptures, and personal study time. I didn't get to bed until 3 am. You'd think I thought I was still a teenager or something.

Saturday morning began with heading to a community baseball parade, which my nephew, S, was involved in. It was so fun! The kids loved it. It was a tad windy, but not bad.

After the parade and some togetherness time, I headed off to my favorite place, the temple. I am so blessed that I have the chance and I take the time to go each week. The view was absolutely amazing this time as the tulips were all in bloom. It was breathtaking as I drove in. I always feel like I am coming home.
Finally, that evening, I picked up my kids from XDH's and we met my parents, and sister and family for dinner. It was our traditional Texas barbecue place. The kids were absolutely crazy, but it was so fun to be together. I can still smell it! Yummy!

It was a Saturday to remember! I can't believe I actually documented it! :) Here's hoping I make it to Sunday, Monday, and today's posts! :) Life sure is busy, but it wouldn't be a good life without it, right?

Busy Week

It has been a busy week for my family. It is fun, though, but busy. LD and I worked on the garden. Wednesday was Pack Meeting. Thursday was the Relief Society Birthday meeting and my parents and sister were here. I ran to the church to be part of the program, then ran back home to my family. My parents are here for my new niece's baby blessing on Sunday. We spent a great day together today (Friday) riding the train, eating a picnic, and playing at the park. LD LOVED it so much when I would give him underdogs on the swings. I wish you could see his face in the picture instead of mine!

I also went tonight to a Single Adult fireside. I was definitely on the very young end of the crowd. Many, if not most, were likely double my age. But, as I sat there, I realized something profound for me: Did I come for the companionship/friendship? Did I come to find a relationship? OR Did I go to feel the love of my Savior, the Spirit, and to learn, grow, and better myself? Once I realized that it was the last one, I found that it was so worth going to. The Spirit was incredible. The answers and reassurances were there.

I am blessed. I am blessed. I get down, but I am always blessed. :)

Just For ME!

My April Ensign just came yesterday.
(For those of my dear friends that are not members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, the Ensign is a monthly Christ-centered magazine that teaches, encourages, and strengthens all that read it.)

I cannot believe how every page seems to fit me and my situation in life right now. How the Lord loves me and sends messages my way! First, there are many articles on "Confidence to Marry." Being divorced and single, I was nervous about how these articles would affect me, but they just touched my heart.

One article stated, " 'Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompense of reward!' Remember that we come into this life hard-wired, so to speak, to fall in love. Don't make it harder than it is! Remember what you know, and move forward with confidence in Heavenly Father and the standing you enjoy as his son or daughter."

Later on in the same article, it stated, "Remember, like every other important decision, marriage is your choice. The Lord will expect you to exercise your judgment. As He said to Oliver Cowdery, 'Behold you have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.' "

What a great reminder for me! The Lord has blessed me with the ability to choose (for a second time) a spouse for now and for forever....I just have to stick by my standards and what I need and want in a man and I will be okay. Sometimes I think my bar is just set way too high, but what a great barometer as I date wonderful men! As the article recommended, I have to change from Fear to Faith.

Then, again, the articles were just for me. Elder Oaks spoke of "The Atonement and Faith." What a beautiful article. Perfect for me again! He said, "Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is a conviction and trust that God knows us and loves us and will hear our prayers and answer them with what is best for us. Faith in the Lord is trust in the Lord. We cannot have true faith in the Lord without also having complete trust in the Lord's will and in the Lord's timing."

Summary: I have to trust in the Lord and trust in myself as I move forward with this whole dating/marriage thing. What a blessing to have the counsel I need to hear come in my mailbox! :)

Painting and Healing

So, I have always wanted to paint my walls. Always. This is our first home, so before that it was apartments and out of the question really. Then, XDH really discouraged me from painting. Since it is my house and my decisions now, I have been planning on painting for months. I finally did it! I LOVE it! I was worried it would be too dark, but I really like it. (Hard to see from the pictures...it is a deep green with a gray tone)

C is so much like me in so many ways. This is no exception. He saw me painting when I came home from school and immediately wanted to help! Don't you love his graffiti? I love it, love it, love it. :)

And, I know that many of you are worried about me. I am healing. I have a wonderful Bishop who took time out of his day Saturday night to counsel with me and strengthen me. I am so blessed. While I don't understand what is happening right now, I see clearly my future and I know I am always in the Lord's hands. I know that I have some things to learn from this trying time. I even know what some of those things are! I am sure there are others, but the Lord will reveal them in his own time. I am one lucky girl, though. I have the gospel, my kids, my piano, my painting, my building, working out, great friends, and many more wonderful things. I am one of the most blessed women on this planet...sometimes I just forget it for a moment. Shame on me. :(

How I know my Savior loves me:

1. He answers my prayers.
2. He knows me.
3. He gives me peace and freedom.
4. He shows me by the way and the when in my answers that they are truly from Him.
5. He speaks directly to me...in a way that I receive revelation, not in the way someone else does, but in a way directly to me. How cool is that?
6. He takes me under His wing, promises me that all His promises are sure, then helps me take that step of faith into the darkness.
7. He reassures me that I am His. I am in His hands and that is exactly where I have always been and where I have always wanted to be.
8. He lets me know that all things that seem mysterious to me are not to Him.

Spring Break: Day 3

Spring Break, Day 3: Castle Park and Breakfast

Every year we buy breakfast and take it to Castle Park. This year is a little cooler than most so I thought we might not....but that would've been mutiny. The kids were so excited. Of all the things on their list to do during Spring Break, this was a must!

It was definitely cooler, even though we first ran errands and didn't eat breakfast until 10:45. We tried walking around while we ate, but it was still chilly. Next we played and played and played. All had a great time and it definitely wasn't too cold when we were running around.

Spring Break Budget Update: $36.50-$7.65 (Donuts and Juice from the supermarket)=$28.85 remaining.

A side note: On a church today was this sign: "Anxiety is unbelief in disguise." So true.

Spring Break: Day 2

Today was a lazy Spring Break day....just what a "break" should be, right? We took our time around the house this morning, then drove up to my sister's and spent time with all the cousins, including my new niece. Sometimes I can't believe how LOUD all these cousins together can be. We had a lot of fun, though! Thanks for having us! :) So....Spring Break Budget update $36.50-$0.00= $36.50! :)

I am woman...hear me roar! (AND recap and Spring Break Day 1)

It has been a great day! :) It has been a very fun and productive few days. I am finding such joy in building and creating. Today, I was out with my power drill, wood, staple gun, and weed cloth making garden boxes. In the middle of doing this, I would run in and work on my homemade bread, then run back out to work some more. I find such joy in doing these things. I guess it is like President Uchtdorf said when he talked about creating. My next project is to build a workbench for my garage so I can buy and utilize more power tools. After that, I will build a shed in the backyard. I have ALWAYS wanted to build and construct. I am loving following my dream this way. I would love to build a house, actually, but....that will be a dream for another day (or decade!)

I spent most of Saturday doing the same types of things: cleaning, building, buying paint, but also playing the piano, reading my scriptures, and attending the temple. I love who I am. I truly am loving the life I live and living the life I love. The void is still very much there, but I once again had some clear answers in the temple....how I love the scriptures and the House of the Lord. So, void or not, I am moving forward and working on loving life to the fullest. I am one of the lucky ones, you know!

I am also LOVING having the kids home for Spring Break. Today was the first day of Spring Break Budget....year #4. We started with $50. We went to the movies and saw Planet 51 (great movie, by the way), spending $13.50 on tickets, popcorn, and a drink, leaving us with $36.50 for the remainder of the week.

So...a bunch of pictures to recap some of the busy week last week, my eventful day on Saturday, and some of the fun things from today (note...I did pictures a little differently since there are so many and now I can't make it work. I'm stopping trying. So, no commentary, I guess. A picture is worth a thousand words anyhow, right? Any questions about what in the world the out-of-order, semi-random pictures are? Just ask. Blogger and I just aren't friends tonight!):

K at her last gymnastics class. She loves it and had a great time!-

Yummy. Yummy. Yummy. God's gift to us is definitely refried black beans, plantains, and a little dollop of sour cream.